I lay in bed tonight struggling with something that I have been struggling with for more than a year now. It’s something that I think a lot of women my age go through. At least I hope they do and I hope that someone has some great advice for me.
It’s a little something called “baby fever.”
I have two beautiful, happy, healthy, boys. They are five and nine and I could not ask for better kids. About a year ago, I mentioned to my husband that I would love to have another baby. was not surprised by his response when he said “Yeah – maybe if we win the lottery.” We were in no position financially to bring another baby into this world. So I dropped it … at least for a little while.
Early this year I got a new job with much better pay and he got a promotion at work. Things were going well so I figured I would try again, but the response was the same. I started asking people for advice and talking to people who had three kids. I also talked to people who had two kids. Almost everyone that I talked to said the same thing. “You have two beautiful, healthy, babies. Just be happy with that.”
It’s not that I’m not happy with that. I love my children more than anything in the world and I am happy. They really are two of the best kids ever. It’s just that there is something inside of me telling me that one more would be great. I think that my youngest would be an amazing big brother and I already know that my oldest is. I feel like there is something left inside of me to give the world. I feel like I was meant to have three kids.
When my husband and I would talk about our future and having kids together it seems like we always talked about having three. So – a few weeks ago, I brought it up again. This time I told him that I didn’t want the lottery answer. I wanted to have a serious conversation about it. I don’t want to wait much longer. I already feel as though a 6 and 10 year age difference would be a lot. If we are going to do it, it would have to be now.
He said “absolutely not. I do not want another baby.” So – here I am … lying in bed wondering how women get over this little thing called “baby fever.” Anyone??